Ode to a Weiner-Licking Dog

Valentine's Day is just not that big of a day in this house. The husband is all "I don't need to be told what day to tell you I love you." That's fairly valid, since he's pretty good about being sweet and romantic, and also he is in the process of preparing a vegetable lasagne for tomorrow, the noodles of which he made with his own hands, which pretty much excuses anything. However, it means that much as I love him, he is not my valentine. You want to know who is? Here's a hint:

That's right, my valentine is Beckett the dog. Beckett, also known as Mr. Puppy and The Boy, was given to me by my parents when I got my undergraduate degree. Little did they know they were buying their only grandchild. Though the now-husband, then boyfriend, did not approve of him at first (he thought he only liked big dogs, but we showed him), he soon realized that Beckett is the son he didn't know he wanted.

Beckett is the weiner-licking dog mentioned in my profile. I know what you're going to say - aren't all dogs, or half of them anyway, weiner-licking dogs? That's true, but my dog licks his weiner on command. It's his own fault, really, that he was taught to do this. He learned that oftentimes when we would say 'oops,' it meant there was food on the floor, and now whenever he hears the word, he comes running. This caused us to realize that it is relatively easy to get him to do on command those things that he already wants to do anyway. So, the husband had an idea, and a week later, if you said "Lick your weiner," the dog would obey. The husband's only regret is that he didn't teach him to do it on the command "Go to town".

This is not his only talent. He can identify and retrieve most of his toys by name (as in, "Get your moose.") He lets us know when there are people in our yard. (We've chosen not to tell him that the "yard" is actually the softball field for the elementary school across the street.) He protects us from such dangers as the paper shredder and any and all other dogs that we happen to encounter as we tred life's path. He does an awesome Princess Di impression:

And he is skilled at camouflage:

And finally, thanks to his dislocating his shoulder when he was 2, he can, when forced, poop while balanced on three legs. (Think of that as you view his pain):

So happy Valentine's Day, Beckett. You are the best dog we could ask for.